In Over Your Head...Good!
Ever feel like you are "In over your head" in a situation or life? I have been feeling this way lately. I made a commitment to myself to make my work a priority in my life by dedicating more time to it. I realize this sounds simple, it even sounds simple to me, however, it has not played out that way. I made a plan. I just need to stop doing some of the things I currently do and start spending that time on my work. Yes, simple. On paper it looks pretty, in my experience, it feels hard and uncomfortable and stressful. I realize that I have had the most difficulty letting go of what I currently do. I still want to spend time with my family and take care of my children and volunteer at their school and talk to friends and family who need to talk and.....And I also want to have time, with no interruptions, to focus on my work. Essentially, I have not let go... I want to focus on my work and I also want to take my children to a birthday party. I feel I am constantly confronted with choices to make where I want both and either choice I make will cause me some degree of pain. So... I continually attempt to do both. I am learning... I am growing... I am beginning to see that I can let go and I must let go and it actually feels good to let go. I am taking on more, but not just to distract myself or to please people, I am taking on more on purpose. I am stepping up to live on purpose in my purpose, and part of that is my work.
I feel "in over my head" because I am pushing myself to expand...to do more...to be more...to share more. I am pushing myself to grow and expand into a person who can do what I want to do.
I am following my dreams and actually going for them.
So, it feels uncomfortable...it feels too big...it often feels like too much... And I TRUST that I will learn to let go... I will learn to swim...I will learn to fly...or whatever else the situation calls for. I am ok with feeling uncomfortable because growing feels uncomfortable. I can feel uncomfortable and focus my attention on what I want and where I am going. I have Faith that this feeling of being "in over my head" actually means that I am on the right track towards growing into my dreams.